You Could Have It So Much Better
by lost in pale blue
Summary: Au pre-series. Logan and Veronica were meant to be. My very first fic. Written for vm santa at Livejournal. I will consider writing more, but it was intended as a standalone.


Veronica fidgeted uncomfortably at the lunch table as Lilly verbally flayed Logan for all of Neptune High to see. Logan gave as good as he got, but Lilly was particularly vicious today, and Veronica wondered how Lilly could do that to someone she supposedly loved. What did Veronica know about love and relationships, though? She had been unceremoniously dumped by Duncan just last week, and she had thought they'd be together forever. And now Duncan wouldn't even look at her, wouldn't explain what she had done wrong to instigate this sudden shunning.

Veronica was ripped out of her brief reverie as Lilly loudly exited the quad in a whirlwind of blonde hair and perfume. Veronica switched her attention to Logan as he stormed off to the parking lot. Quickly gathering her things, she jumped up to follow him. She may be Lilly's best friend, but Logan was her friend, too, and he was the one who needed her right now.

"Logan!" she called out as she ran to catch up.

Logan looked back at her but continued on to his truck.

"Wait up," Veronica panted.

"What do you want, Veronica?" Logan bit out. "I'm not in the mood to hear any words of wisdom from Saint Veronica right now."

Logan immediately regretted his harsh words when a hurt look crossed Veronica's face.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay," she explained. "I thought you could use a friend."

Logan unlocked his truck as they talked and climbed inside.

"Shouldn't you be concerned about Lilly instead? She's your best friend, after all, and I'm only the asshole who dared to call her on her crap."

Veronica hopped into the passenger seat of the Xterra and Logan rolled his eyes at her persistence.

"Lilly doesn't need my concern," Veronica continued. "She thinks everything she does and says is justified." 

Logan snorted at that. "And you don't? Come on, Veronica. You're Lilly's plaything, just like I am. Don't tell me you're actually going against her for once?"

He pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the beach. Some surfing always helped to blow off steam.

"I'm not her plaything," Veronica protested, "and I hate the way she treats you!"

Logan's expression conveyed his surprise. Quiet Veronica Mars was getting riled up. About him.

Veronica continued in a softer voice, "Why do you let her treat you that way? You don't deserve it."

Logan didn't say anything for a moment. He was too shocked at her question. He kept his focus on the road and eventually answered in a quiet voice. "I know I love Lilly more than she loves me. She fools around on me all the time, you know? I'm not blind or stupid." He paused as they pulled into the beach's parking lot, and shut off the engine. Veronica sat quietly, looking at Logan and listening to the Xterra's engine settling as she waited for Logan to continue. Finally, Logan moved to get out of the truck and Veronica followed suit.

As they walked down to the beach, Logan spoke again. "Lilly and I, we can be really great together." He sat down in the soft sand and Veronica joined him. Logan ran his hand through his hair and resumed. "It's like I'm the only person she sees and I get caught up in that feeling. But it never lasts. She gets bored and finds someone else to entertain her."

Veronica started to interject, but Logan continued. "I guess I keep hoping that she'll see how much I love her and that it'll be enough, but it never will be. That's not what she wants. I'm not even sure it's what _I_ want anymore." He paused. "I think we're over for good."

Veronica was surprised at how introspective and open Logan was being with her. While she had known Logan for years, he was never one to discuss his true feelings about anything. He always wore the mask of the arrogant, spoiled son of movie stars who rarely let his real face show. Veronica felt privileged to see this side of Logan. She gently took his hand.

"Logan, I'm sorry that Lilly doesn't appreciate how much you love her and how special you are. I know she can be selfish, but I also think she loves you the only way she knows how." Veronica hesitated, embarrassed to expose her feelings like this, but needing for Logan to hear the truth of her words. "I wish she loved you the way you deserve."

Logan's eyes were soft as he looked at Veronica. "I guess we've both been screwed by the Kanes, huh? I always thought Duncan was an idiot for breaking up with you."

Veronica couldn't help the blush that crawled up her face as she realized that she and Logan were still holding hands.

Logan smiled shyly. "You know, I had a crush on you when we were 12, and I wanted to ask you to be my girlfriend."

Veronica looked at him with wide eyes and quietly asked, "Why didn't you?"

"I knew Duncan liked you too, and I thought I wasn't good enough for you, so I let him be the lucky one." Logan turned away briefly then faced her again. "I wish I had picked you instead, Veronica. You're smart and funny and beautiful. And most importantly, genuine and loyal. You would never play with my heart like Lilly has."

Logan was looking at her so intently, and his words were causing her heart to pound. She was having trouble breathing, but summoned up her courage.

"I had a crush on you too, Logan." He smiled and she was able to move past her nervousness. "I thought you didn't notice me that way. No one ever did with Lilly around."

"Oh, Veronica. I can't believe how stupid we were! You're so much more than Lilly could ever be, and I wish I hadn't let myself get caught up in her."

Veronica blushed again and stammered out, "I wish that, too. And I wish I hadn't let Duncan pull me away from who I really wanted."

Veronica couldn't believe she had just admitted all that to Logan and couldn't meet his eyes any longer.

Logan turned so that they were completely facing one another and with his free hand, pulled her chin up to look at him.

"I think this is the perfect opportunity for us to both have what we really want, the Kanes be damned." Logan looked more nervous than Veronica had ever seen him. He rubbed the back of his neck and asked, "What do you think?"

Veronica paused as she gave it some thought. She quickly decided that she and Logan deserved to be happy. She didn't care what Lilly and Duncan thought. Logan was special and she wanted to be the one to show him. She leaned towards Logan and their lips met in a soft, gentle kiss.

It was all the answer that Logan needed.


End file.
